— Mandy Patinkin on Charlie Rose last night. (via jsmooth995)
You know, I’m probably going to be on antidepressants for the rest of my life, and I’m FINE with that, I’m THRILLED about that, because I am one of the profoundly lucky people with chronic major depression who have been granted an escape route and managed to follow it. And I’m thrilled to be in a new relationship (which I now realize I haven’t mentioned before around here, but tumblr, he’s so NICE. I really like him). I’m absolutely, uncomplicatedly happy with my life right now.
But it’s still kind of bizarre to feel like two of the biggest things that have shaped my life, experiences, and sense of self — queerness and depression — are not meaningfully real for anyone who meets me right now. Obviously I’m much more okay with this as it applies to depression, since that’s a hell of a lot more in the past than my unchanged sexuality, but still. Still! It’s not trivial! I can’t function without taking pills every day! That matters! It just bugs me that it doesn’t seem to matter how out I am about either thing. The majority of the people I tell about my depression and my bisexuality (which is pretty much everyone, I am super out) do not and will not understand them to be fundamental parts of who I am now.
This message brought to you by the extremely unsubtle dream I had last night about cheating on my boyfriend with one of the lesbians in my program (who I’m not actually into) and having to explain it to him and feeling massive guilt, HAHA, WAY 2 GO BRAIN, MASTERFULLY DONE
what the hell is the thought process when people tell bisexuals they’re prob gonna change their mind later. like what do u think is gonna happen?? they’ll change their mind and be like “OH, YA GOT ME! NICE ONE, PAL!” then everyone high-fives and laughs the whole thing off?? like is it too goddamn difficult to consider the fact that pressuring someone to pick a side and stick with it might make the shitty garbage process of coming out even more trying and that maybe you are making it even more difficult for people to be honest to themselves and others??? POSSIBLY???? PERHAPS???????
Got into a festive Thanksgiving fight with my brother about him saying, in response to the news that I have a boyfriend, “so, you’re back to men now?” That’s not… how it works…